Meryl and the missing vaccine victims

Meryl has been under pressure lately, with several government agencies pursuing her and the media becoming very unsympathetic in their reporting. So what better way to rustle up some support (and the usual drive for cash) than by showcasing a lineup of children “killed or injured by vaccines”? Great idea Meryl, soon the cash will surely be rolling in…

Oops, just one problem though…

Yes that’s right: Australia’s leading antivaccination campaigner and self-described “Australia’s leading expert on vaccination”, could not come up with a single report of vaccine injury in almost 24 hours. [There were zero responses on Twitter either.]

But Meryl frequently states that the real rate of death and injury from vaccines is “ten times higher than the official reports”, and that the she receives many such reports from her cult members marks, well from unnamed parents. And yet despite their reported gratitude for Meryl’s help, none of them responded to help her buy a new iPad the AVN fundraising drive.

Oh dear, Meryl!

Meryl builds a lie before your eyes

Poor Meryl often claims persecution and even martyrdom in order to attract sympathy and, more importantly, cash donations from her followers. Meryl’s lies are now exposed no matter where she publishes them and her misinformation is corrected immediately by the many rational & educated observers now keeping an eye on her – but this doesn’t make for a dramatic story to bring in the big bucks. So Meryl needs to lie about the opposition to her lies in order to keep the big bucks rolling in. After all, $280,000 per year doesn’t just grow on trees you know!

Here’s a textbook example of Meryl in action:

1. Meryl tweets a link to a truly absurd blog post written by nationally recognised idiot Judy Wilyman: http://avn.org.au/nocompulsoryvaccination/?p=1307
2. Like many rational readers, Tracey finds the dense concentration of wacky conspiracy theories and long-debunked antivax canards to be overwhelming. She laughs out loud, via post on Twitter.
3. Meryl decides to make hay from the ridicule she suffers, and sets up a strawman by trying to link Tracey’s amusement at a retarded blog post to poor little sick kids – a classic persecution play: “Help help, I’m being repressed!”.
4. Then she swings for the fences by tying in her favourite enemies: Australian Skeptics and fans of the SAVN Facebook page. She generalises to claim frequent and widespread callous behaviour towards sick kids – without a single shred of evidence.

Meryl and the limericks

Fans of the Stop AVN page on Facebook have been having some rhyming fun with Meryl’s infamous exploits; here are the results:

To read Living Woo magazine
All AVN minions are keen
While taking their money
Meryl finds it so funny
that they’ll pay for what never is seen

‎”I’m a martyr!” you’ll hear Meryl whining
Amid all that self-aggrandising
Pissing on science
Is valid defiance
When Dorey is doing the defining

An anti-vax nutter crusader
A logic and reason evader
A hat of tin foil
A cart of snake oil
Come and join! (Just as long as you’ve paid her.)

The antivax crank, Meryl Dorey
Claims there’s two sides to the story
But her so-called conviction
Is nothing but fiction
An addiction to false claims on glory

Her efforts to be anti-vax
Lead Dorey astray of the facts
Amid the correction
And deceit detection
She scrambles to cover her tracks

Dear Leader cries “ACTION ALERT!
My purse strings are starting to hurt!
So here is a tale
Of woo, woe and wail
Now DONATE, including your shirt!”

An antivax liar named Meryl
Flounders to show there’s a peril
In getting kids vaxed.
Responding with facts
Is like shooting fish in a barrel.

When TV or radio discusses
Measles or mumps or pertussis,
Meryl calls with the claim
That she’s got a brain
Though it struggles to do itself justice

When Meryl was shown to cause harm,
She rushed off to court in alarm
“The H-triple-C
Has no power over me!”
And soon she’ll be losing the farm.

It there’s a lie, Meryl will shout it.
If there’s a law, Meryl will flout it.
Indisputable fact?
Related to vax?
You can bet the farm Meryl will doubt it.

There once was an awful quotee
Whose words were read out on TV
The dirty old rat
Said “Did _I_ say that
I don’t believe I did, let me see”

“Da gubbermint’s ebil” she said
“Dey poyzun us out ov our head
I redd it online
The trooth is all mine
Now subscribe and give me your bread”

A sceptic, dear Meryl is not
When she considers all vaccines to be rot
Her bias and confounding
Are truely astounding
Hence why she is the laughing stock

When Meryl said ‘I have a brain’
My sides split with laughter and pain
A tertiary degree
May yet let her see
Her Dunning and Kruger is plain.

An antivax activist’s story
Spread eagerly by Meryl Dorey
Though baseless in science
Displays her reliance
On appeals to emotion and worry.

Meryl’s new theme song

Alie Thompson penned a new theme song for Meryl, in recognition of her level of expertise in science & medicine. It should be sung to the tune of “Wonderful World” by Sam Cooke. Enjoy!

Don’t know much about chemistry,
Don’t know much biology.
Don’t know much about a science book,
Don’t know much about journals or books.
But I do know that I love woo,
And I know that if you love woo, too,
What a disease ridden world this would be.

Don’t know much about immunology,
Don’t know much virology.
Don’t know much about mercury,
Don’t know what adjuvants are for.
But I know that one and one is three,
And if you can’t add up like me,
What a disease ridden world this would be.

I don’t claim to be an health adviser,
But I sure would like to be.
For maybe by having a brain, oh baby,
I can win you over to me.

Don’t know much about chemistry,
Don’t know much biology.
Don’t know much about a science book,
Don’t know much about journals or books.
But I do know that I love woo,
And I know that if you love woo, too,
What a disease ridden world this would be.

Chemistry
Biology
Science book
Journals or books.
But I do know that I love woo,
And I know that if you love woo, too,
What a disease ridden world this would be.

Meryl’s accurate introduction

Hilariously original blogger Shelley Stocken has proposed that whenever Meryl makes one of her increasingly infrequent public appearances, her host should introduce her to the audience with a great deal more honesty and accuracy than Meryl herself utters when she speaks. Something like this would do nicely:

Meryl’s medical qualifications

In this short clip Meryl explains her medical qualifications and basis for calling herself, “Australia’s leading expert on (anti)vaccination”:

Yes, you heard that right: Meryl’s qualifications consist solely of “I have a brain”.

And that’s true, she does in fact have a brain. Here it is:

Meryl the government-certified liar

In 2010, Meryl earned a unique distinction for her organisation: after a lengthy investigation it was found to publish antivaccination misinformation. In other words, Meryl was government-certified as a liar.

Well done, Meryl! All antivaccinationists lie, but no one else has lied as publicly, obviously and callously as you – sufficient to receive this unique recognition.

Oh, Meryl!

Meryl’s trouble with the truth

Here’s a quick introduction to a few of Meryl’s favourite lies:

There is an ancient proverb which reads, “If Meryl Dorey’s lies were laid end to end, they would stretch…all the way from the start of a very large book to the end of it”.

For the last couple of years, Ken McLeod has been busy proving the wisdom of this saying in a unique way: he’s simply been documenting every lie that Meryl tells, as she tells them. Well, nearly every lie, because sometimes her lies come so thick & fast that no one can hope to keep up. But most of them are being captured and shared in ebooks: 3 full ebooks so far and doubtless still more to come in future.

Have a read for yourself and look at Meryl’s standard level of honesty:

Meryl Dorey’s Trouble With The Truth, Part 1

Meryl Dorey’s Trouble With The Truth, Part 2

Meryl Dorey’s Trouble With The Truth, Part 3

This woman couldn’t lie straight in bed!

Oh, Meryl…

Meryl and the press release that flopped

Everyone makes a mistake now and then, occasionally gets a fact or two wrong and usually corrects themselves when it’s pointed out. But only Meryl can demonstrate such a true mastery of mistakes that it is breathtaking to watch her in action. She truly is a Warrior of Wrong, the Emperess of Error!

Meryl’s ill-fated recent trip to Perth caused her a litany of woes, not least of which was triggering a government investigation of the AVN and significant publicity of same. Meryl decided to counter the onslaught of bad press the only way she knows how: by lying some more. Meryl put out a press release claiming there was no investigation into the AVN and alleging that the journalist who wrote the story also submitted the complaint.

A month later the results are well and truly in:

• The investigation into the AVN is still under way
• The complaint which triggered the investigation was not filed by the journalist, but by a member of the public.
• There was no ethical breach by the journalist

Meryl Dorey managed to get every single fact in her press release wrong. That’s all of them. That type of form, that level of consistent & flawless mastery is only ever shown by the truly gifted who’ve also spent many long years practicing their craft. Yes, she’s the Queen of Cock-Ups, the Baroness of Bloopers, the Master of Misjudgment, the General of Goofs, the Duchess of Dumb, the Sovereign of Stuff-Ups…I could do this all day, but you get the idea.

Oh, Meryl!

Meryl makes up immune suppression

Meryl is generally shameless: she never seems to get embarrassed, she can say the stupidest things with a straight face and doesn’t get embarrassed when she’s show to be wildly, completely, inexcusably wrong.

So that makes this video a rare treat from the archives: Meryl saying something so spectacularly dumb that even she was embarrassed. The AVN took this video down and filed false DMCA notices to try and get it removed from other sites in the hope that it would disappear entirely. No such luck Meryl, we’re going to be laughing at this for a long time to come…

Oh, Meryl!